


I just wanna feel like you see me

by TheGoodmanTJ



Category: Andi Mack (TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Coming Out, M/M, This is post 3x13, platonic! Tuffy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-02
Updated: 2019-03-02
Packaged: 2019-11-07 23:38:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,635
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17970236
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheGoodmanTJ/pseuds/TheGoodmanTJ
Summary: “Get to the point, TJ!” she interrupted.“Kira made me choose.” he mumbled."I didn’t hear that. You’re going to have to speak up.”“Kira made me-”“Hey, TJ! What’s going on over here?” A voice came from behind him.





	I just wanna feel like you see me

**Author's Note:**

> This was based off a prompt on tumblr found here : http://daddyrheeig.tumblr.com/post/183142756831/yall-imagine-this-ight-tj-approaches-buffy-alone
> 
> tl;dr - TJ is trying to fix things with Cyrus by talking to Buffy. Kira comes in to intervene and Buffy isn't having it.
> 
> Hope you like it!

To say that TJ was nervous, was an understatement. To say that TJ felt like an awful friend, no, human being, was an understatement. To say that TJ was afraid that he had just ruined everything good he had going for him, and might never be able to get it back, was an understatement. There were so many things he had been feeling, and happy was far from it. It had been a week since costume day. The day he broke Cyrus’ heart. No, the day he broke Cyrus completely.

He had been trying for awhile now to talk to Cyrus, but everytime he got close the other boy just quickly turned on his heels and walked away. He even tried reaching out to Andi, and Buffy a few times before this but they always made up some excuse as to why they needed to be anywhere but right there talking to him and left. It all just made him feel so alone, so helpless on the inside. He hadn’t left his house for anything except school. His homework had been left abandoned on his desk because the thought of looking at it only reminded him of the betrayal. He even stopped going to practice at nights. He just didn’t have the energy to do anything. All he wanted was Cyrus, but he couldn’t even have that anymore. He honestly should’ve given up by now. Clearly Cyrus was never going to talk to him again, and that was just something he was going to have to live with. It pained him to think about, but he just needed to face the facts. He messed up by listening to Kira, letting her scare him away from the one thing that mattered most to him. But the thought of what she could do? It still terrified him to think about. So he knew there was only one thing he had to do. He had to make this right on his own. Take care of everything so that there was nothing else Kira could hold against him. He could be free, happy, and best of all, he could have Cyrus. He had to at least try to make things right. Otherwise there was no sense in feeling bad about himself.

He was quietly pacing outside of the gym, taking a glance inside every so often through the little windows on the doors. He was waiting for the girls practice to finish so he could try and have a word with Buffy. This time, it was now or never. If he didn’t stop her now, he probably couldn’t ever. Several more minutes had gone by before the heavy blue doors had finally swung open and one by one the girls’ team left the gym and headed into the locker room. Buffy was the last one to leave, so before she was able to make it into the locker room, TJ took this as his moment to intervene. He stepped in front of her, blocking her path so she had to give him some sort of attention. It was a horrible thing to do realistically, but he had to, it was all for Cyrus.

He watched as she eyed him, clearly annoyed. She huffed out a breath. “What do you want, TJ?”

“Buffy, please.” he begged. “Give me just five minutes to explain myself. I’ve been trying for days to talk to Cyrus and he won’t even look at me. I can’t even say anything to you or Andi because you won’t hear me out. Please, I’m begging you, I can’t take this anymore. I miss Cyrus.” He hadn’t intended to sound as sad as he did, but it was how he truly felt. Thankfully the added emotion in his voice seemed to help because her gaze softened, and a slight smile appeared on her face.

“Fine, you have five minutes. But only because it’s nice to see you suffering for once.” she smirked. “And, well, if I’m being honest I hate seeing Cyrus like this too. He’s never been this upset TJ. Do you even realize what you did?” Her tone got angrier as she spoke, causing TJ to flinch. The last thing he had ever wanted to do was hurt Cyrus, and he’s never been this upset in all the time Buffy has known him? Hearing that hurt TJ the most.

“I’m sorry.” he mumbled, his gaze slowly dropping down to his shoes.

“Don’t tell me.” she scoffed. “Cyrus is the one you hurt.”

“I’m trying! Will you just let me talk?”

“Well, you haven’t done much except apologize to me and well…” she takes a moment to check her phone. “You have about three minutes left.” she reminded him

“Okay, listen. I wanted to do the costume with Cyrus, I really did. It was even my idea. I had everything planned out. I had my board shorts all ready, and I did need to go to the store to buy new-”

“Get to the point, TJ!” she interrupted.

“Kira made me choose.” he mumbled.

“I didn’t hear that. You’re going to have to speak up.”  
  
“Kira made me-”

“Hey, TJ! What’s going on over here?” A voice came from behind him. He turned his head to see Kira walk up on his side. Her face filled with attitude. “Buffy.” she said, looking at the other girl, a very un-enthusiastic tone in her voice.

TJ froze. God, why was she here? She wasn’t on the basketball team so what reason did she even have for staying after school? It’s like she was purposely waiting for them. Actually, when he thought about it, it seemed like she was everywhere. Everytime he wanted to talk to Cyrus she would come out of nowhere after he had walked away. Half of the time when he had tried to find Andi, or Buffy, she would cut him off and lead him in the opposite direction. Everything she had been doing seemed to point to tearing him and Cyrus apart. He felt his body start to move again as he heated up from the burning rage that was slowly building up inside of him, his hands clenching into a fist. He turned to face her as he slowly started to see red.

“What’s going on over here? I’m trying to fix the mistakes that  _ **I**_  made because of  _ **you**_.” he shouted.

She seemed to be unphased by his anger. “What are you talking about? Do you mean that stupid costume with Cyrus that you’ve been crying about all week. What was it… the circular salt or whatever? Again, that makes no sense.”

“ _Summer-salt_. It was a  _ **somersault**_. It was our thing, and  _ **you**_  ruined it.”

“Oh please.” she scoffed “Don’t forget you happily agreed to costume with me.”

His anger started to fade away and was replaced with an overwhelming sense of sadness. She was still doing it. Even here, and now, after everything was said and done she was still trying to make him feel bad about himself.

“Happily? You think I was  _happy_  to pair up with you?” His voice began to crack, his lips quivering with each word that left his mouth. “Do you think I liked seeing my best friend in so much pain because I betrayed him all because of what  ** _you_**  said. You know what you were trying to do Kira. Don’t even try and lie to me. We both know what you were trying to imply and you knew that I would be forced to say yes otherwise you were going to make my life miserable. But now, someone I care about is hurt Kira. God I can’t- I’m so  _stupid_.”

“Yeah, I know how you cared about him TJ. After all, you should be thanking me.” she claimed.

He turned away as the tears began to roll down his cheeks. He didn’t want her to see him like this. He didn’t want her to know that she had won, but it was too late. There was nothing he could do now. She had ruined his life, and nobody could help him now. Cyrus didn’t want to talk to him anymore. Andi never really wanted to talk to him in the first place so he couldn’t even try and make things right with Cyrus from her, and Buffy-

“What is  _wrong_  with you, Kira?!”

TJ’s head shot up. Buffy?

“Thanking you?” she continued, sounding more annoyed than she ever had when TJ had been rude to her. “You clearly manipulated him by trying to insinuate that there’s something wrong with him, you controlled him by playing off of his fears which is an absolutely disgusting thing to do, and you made him hurt the  _ **one**_  person that cares about him the most. The  _one_  person  _that **he**_  cares about the most. You did some awful things on the court Kira, and I will never regret kicking you off the team. But this? What you’ve done to him? That’s despicable.”

She shook her head at Kira, grabbing his arm and guiding him through the gym doors. “C’mon TJ. We need to get out of here.”

He couldn’t remember much after that, everything had been a blur. He just remembered crying, and being lead out of the school by Buffy.

The next thing he knew they were at the spoon, sitting in a lone booth up against the wall, far away from everyone else. Thankfully it had been a quiet night, he didn’t know if he would have been able to deal with too many people. They were waiting on whatever Buffy had ordered for them, because he couldn’t even remember the waiter coming over to them. He had so many things on his mind. He never even got to finish explaining to Buffy what had happened with the costume. Now he may never get the chance to talk to Cyrus again. The hole in his heart seemed to grow bigger with that thought and apparently the expression on his face matched that because it wasn’t long before Buffy seemed interested in his feelings.

“TJ. You can talk to me. I promise whatever you say will stay between us.” she whispered, placing her hand over his.

“I just- I never got to explain what happened with-”

“No, TJ. It’s okay. You don’t need to talk about that. I think I saw enough. I can’t believe anyone would ever do something like that. Even Kira, as much as I hate to admit it.”

“No.” he whimpered, as his eyes began to well up again. “It’s not okay. I’ve ruined everything with Cyrus. Now he’ll never talk to me again. Classic TJ, anything good, I gotta ruin it.”

“TJ please, give Cyrus some time. He’ll come around. I’ll even talk to him about it, you guys will be friends again in no time. I swear it.”

‘Friends’ he laughed in response to that. He didn’t want to be friends. He wanted to be so much more than that with Cyrus. That’s all he’s ever wanted. Ever since he helped him get that chocolate chocolate chip muffin. He may not have noticed his feelings for him then, but it’s safe to say that’s when it all started.  
  
“I don’t get it, what’s so funny?”

He smiled at her. “I don’t want to be friends with him, Buffy.”

Her face morphed into the most bewildered expression he had ever seen on anyone before. “TJ I- I don’t-”

“I’m gay, Buffy. I like Cyrus. Kira clearly noticed that and threatened to out me to everyone.” he paused for a moment, trying to stop himself from crying again. “I never really wanted to admit it. I mean, I’ve liked Cyrus for awhile now but It- she made everything feel so real. It made me afraid. I’m happy with who I am, that will never change. But…. but what about everyone else? What will they think?”

His gaze slowly lowered as he felt Buffy grab onto both of his hands and grasp them tightly.

“TJ.” her voice sounded so soft, so vulnerable, as if she was getting a little emotional herself. He never looked up from his lap. “I’m so sorry you ever had to go through that TJ. Making you believe that there was something wrong with you, that there was something wrong with being gay. I don’t know what you’re feeling right now, but I promise that everything is going to be okay. I know we’ve had our differences in the past, and we never started off on the right foot. But I’m here for you. Now, and forever. You can always come to me if you ever need something, I promise. And I promise that you’ll be able to go to Cyrus too. I’m going to be honest TJ, you and Cyrus, neither of you are very subtle.”

He quickly looked up from his lap, to see a smile on her face. “W-what do you mean?”

“It was easy to see that you liked Cyrus. That first day when I found you on the swings… I’ll admit it was- weird. To say the least, but he looked so happy. Or when you did that crazy rap apology thing for me, I know it was Cyrus who had convinced you. Or when he went after you at the basketball game to make sure you were okay. Do I even need to mention bringing the challah bread to the shiva? Everything you have ever done for him, or the things he had done for you, shows just how much you care about each other.”  
  
“So… what are you saying?” He asked, sitting up straight in the seat. Did Cyrus like him back? Wait is Cyrus-

“I, am not saying anything.” she smirked. “But, I will tell you that if you give me some time, you might be hearing from Cyrus again. Maybe even sooner than you think.” she finished with a wink.

He smiled to himself. Maybe everything was going to be okay. He never imagined that Buffy was going to be the first person he came out to, or that it would happen in this way, but he was glad that it had happened.

“Thank you.” he looked at her, sincere smile on his face “I never knew how much I needed a friend like you.”

“Please, TJ. I know we had a rough start. But at the end of the day, Cyrus cares about you so much. And that means I do too.” she smiled. “Plus, you’re not that bad after all.”

“Whatever Driscoll.” he smiled, rolling his eyes.

As their food came, they ate in silence. The events of the past couple of hours had taken an immense physical and emotional toll on TJ, even more than the past week had on its own, and Buffy decided it was best if he spent this time just relaxing. But he knew he could be thankful for one thing. After everything that had happened that day, it seemed like things were looking up for him after all. One of the last people he had ever expected to come to his rescue, had done exactly that, and he couldn’t feel any better about it. That and it seemed like he was really was going to get a second chance after all. There was a part of him that still had its doubts, but deep down he knew that if anyone could help mend their friendship, it was going to be Buffy. So when they had finished eating, and had gotten up to leave, saying that TJ had been surprised to see Cyrus standing there smiling, waiting for him at the door, would’ve been a complete understatement. He was so much more than that. Because for the first time in a week, he was happy.

**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to come follow me on Tumblr @TheGoodmanTJ


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